Sunday, September 5, 2010


"That's not jade green," he says. I poke a green colored pencil into the color can. It splays out with the others.

"Yeah, it is," I say and tip the can to see better.

He shakes his head. "That's NOT the jade green." I paw through pointed ends, frown. Plain green, where's the plain green?

Janie eyes that boy, "Actually Jack," she says, "it is. Whatever Mom says is TRUE." She raises her eyebrows, pauses, pencil poised, then scratches more memory to paper.

I run my fingers through long pencil colors. They clank in the can. True. Whatever Mom says is TRUE. I swing yellow-green into hand and cradle the idea: Everything I say is true.

Well, ok.


163. The unmade bed that forced me to relax all day.

164. The way Lucy says, "Meditates," when we practice Psalm1.

165. Peach pie made with extra lemon.

166. An invite to Thanksgiving and family and the ocean.

167. 29 cans of dilly beans.

168. Children who ate fist fulls of raw beans when I didn't serve lunch until 2:00.

169. Cousins who picked five gallons with us just before the afternoon burst into rain.

170. Fresh dill.

171. Huge basil leaves.

172. Husband who pulled the potato plants and the children who scooped dirt and taters out of the garden.

173. Homemade hot dog buns.

174. Pepper jelly.

175. Sliced tomatoes still on the table after school work until Janie notices and eats them all.

176. How Jack wrinkles up his forehead when we learn how rain is made.

177. Books and books and books. Books everywhere in this house.

178. My laundry room wiped and scrubbed and rearranged tidy.

179. Glory to God. Even my worst will be turned into good.

180. The window of influence Craig and I have with our children. Complete devoted influence.

181. The closing of that window day by day until they are their own.

182. And that even then, we can still pray.

holy     experience


Manda said...

Isn't it those statements that truly make us pause and realize our influence in these precious little lives?
I'm honoured to be that woman in lives of my little women.
What a lovely list of thanks...

Goat said...

I used to think letting go of my influence was the hard part. But now I think that engaging with the mountain of influence that I had with my kids while they were still very young was harder by far.

Influence in a small child's life seemed only vaguely important in light of grown-up pursuits.

-t- said...

stopped in from Ann's
love your list of gifts
#164- it's those moments, those memories I wish we could play back like an old black-and-white movie :)
His blessings to you & yours-

Myrtle's Turtles said...

My son said a similar thing..and it made me think about how important my words and walk is. I enjoyed my visit! Stopped over from Ann's blog.

jeana said...

What an important role we play! I am honored to join you on this journey in gratitude.

Kim Hyland said...

Bethany, your posts take me back to precious days with my littles, now bigs, and make me treasure the days I still have left with my littlest (8 next month). Can I hire Janie to set my boys straight? I love all the life and FOOD in your gratitude list, and I too am so thankful for #182

Lindsey V said...

Although I don't know Lucy, I felt like I could truly imagine her little voice saying "Meditates" (have been a children's pastor for years).

Love your list!

Heather said...

I love, love , love your list but I can't believe you starved your children until 2pm! :) Your list makes me want to come by for awhile. Think I could do that? :)

Have a good week.
love, Heather

emily wierenga said...

that's a heavy weight, that being known as the truth-speaker, but a calling the God we love can fulfill... and what a good mama you are, that your daughter says so... love to you.

deb said...

you write home.
I love the beauty and grace here.

Lori said...

I love your lists - so full of sweet, poignant moments. :) Love you!

emily wierenga said...

i miss you too :) and i hope you can post next week with me. i was thinking of you yesterday, hoping you were well. funny how we can miss each other, never having met, but that's the wonder of life, no? love to you, sweet girl. e.

emily wierenga said...

thank you, thank you, for praying...

savannah is in stable condition now. glory to him. and love to you. xo

Nona Yerbiznus said...

I gotta tell ya, that gratitude list just made me REALLY hungry. And I so shouldn't eat anything else tonight....

Adina said...

A closing window. . .
That's a thought I'll take with me when I greet my kids this evening.