"Momma," Janie tilts a mess of curls to one side, "do you know for sure we're gonna turn out to be good guys?"
Good guys. She pictures Daddy and me. I pause, reach for another slice of bread, spread out peanut butter to the corners. I remember how I lugged Lulie out of the pantry a week ago, peeled back her pretty eyelid frantic to find a tiny contact lens, how I combed the house with a flashlight and my bad eyes. I looked and looked and sobbed, shouted for everyone to get their jammies on already. The invisible lens takes a month to replace. I can still feel the sinus headache I had when we left for the doctor the next day.
And even so, Lulie passed the vision test, with the wrong contact. Passed.
I wonder if I passed my test. Of faith.
Children learn foremost by passive observation. Ken Ortiz's words ring in my ears, take my breath away.
4 comments:
Ooooh - great quote. Knowing you, I'm positive that you recovered from the "contact incident" well - and with prayer.
I've been finding it odd how I know the Holy Spirit is in me, yet I can completely ignore that sacred closeness as if it were nothing. Yet, it is my rudder for knowing the right thing to do and be. Passive observation is a powerful language, akin to quiet listening to the Holy Spirit. Sometimes you don't even know you have heard or learned, but there it is.
So happy she is seeing! But why so long on the replacement?
Unfortunately, insurance considers all contacts a convenience and does not take vision development into account for young patients. {sigh} Our ophthalmologist actually ordered the first one direct from the manufacturer (which arrived with in a few days) with the intention of sending our insurance provided one back in its place. Insurance does allow us to order two at a time as if Lulie were wearing one in each eye but we would use the second one as a back up instead. Well, if we hadn't already lost it! Oh well, guess we'll end up ordering quite a few over the next years. At least she's not going totally blind until it gets here. Yeah, at least she's seeing! Thanks for asking. :)
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